What we need to STOP saying to Christian Singles | Rant Video

what’s up you guys is Katie I’m sorry I just a video last week it was totally unintentional but I’m currently filming a bunch of videos ahead of time because I’m going on vacation for two and a half weeks in June I’m going to Europe and I’m really excited so I’m just timing sure I can get ahead on videos now so that I can post stuff on the way so basically I got behind you can try to get ahead so forgive me please is what I’m saying if you have to watch me for a while you’ll know that there was quite a substantial period of my life where I was single I mean singleness was kind of like the way I started this channel so singleness was like something I definitely experienced and dealt with in my life and as such I have a lot of people come up to me and give me advice and encouragement about my situation what I learned in my almost three years experience of receiving advice about singleness is that this is not a two-sided coin issue and all rights are either going to tell you head or they’re going to tell you tales no they could tell you heads tails shoulders elbows left pinky toes who knows what’s going to come under their nose but can we just we just chat about this for a second first off for the people that I think is you’re like talking to them and having a nice conversation and it comes up that you’re singles or automatic responses oh my gosh I’m so sore I need to cry up so insensitive I didn’t mean by I’m so sorry newsflash everybody out there it’s not like as soon as I tell you I’m single you need to go into this panic mode where you’re like oh my gosh this is a sad wounded person and I need to put all the band-aids on this sensitive topic we’re not being oversensitive humans who like crumble at the touch and break down into tears as soon as we talk of cocaine single what we’re really getting frustrated though is all of the blanket statement advice that they like just give to you is that they wrap it up in this little bow and then hand it to you and they’re like here poof all your problems are better now because of this generic statement that doesn’t actually mean anything and I’ll actually believe myself but it’s going to help you just be you and God will bring the right person to you you need to be fully complete and confident in yourself before God can bring someone else to you just take this time to focus solely on the Lord because when your life is flourishing with God he will bring that person to you I’m sorry guys but I just need to tell you that since David and I are dating now what that obviously means is that my spiritual life is significantly better than yours if you’re single because obviously the reason God brought him into my life was just because I was on that spiritual level and I was fully right with God I was myself I was complete and that he he gifted me this relationship because of that and so I’m so much spiritually better than I was four months ago when I was single and I I just don’t know what to tell you I mean I hope you get on the spiritual level one day and that God brings that guy to you because of your spiritual achievement in case my sarcastic demeanor was a little bit unclear for you let me just spell it out I think that’s a ton of crap okay what you’re telling me is that every single person I know who is in a relationship is in this wonderful spiritual place where they just love the Lord they’re fully themselves they have no problem and that’s why God brought them that person they took that time to focus on themselves and then they got this guy I mean if you can genuinely do that and think about everybody you know this relationship and be like yeah all of them totally totally awesome totally walking to the Lord like I don’t you can’t like this doesn’t make any sense it’s so not true a hundred percent keep doing it chase after the Lord and you do anything I was going to keep up with you and you cancer the Lord together but it’s not like you need to unlock the spiritual level and then that’s where everybody is where they get like married and dating and stuff like using an example from my life I haven’t told my sister I’m going to share this but when my sister got engaged she was 19 and she got married at 20 and she never really had a period of singleness in her life and so she didn’t really have that timer she was like fully chaiten after God and becoming confident herself but just being her and waiting for the right guy to come along and then she unlocked the level and gods like Rebecca here is your husband you have done well it wasn’t like that that’s not how life works every single person is different and that’s why I don’t like these blanket statements for everybody because regardless of your walk and what your life looks like they’ll just tell you this and this like this is going to be magical advice for you it’s like no my unique situation is not necessarily going to be fixed by your blanket hat answer another what I love is this God is taking this time right now to prepare an amazing person for you and if you’re patient and if you wait he will bring them to you timmi that advice is giving me free rein to do nothing with my life and just wait around for God to drop this person on my doorstep but if I would actually do that I wouldn’t meet the person because it’s all of this like we get told that there’s going to be this big grand gesture that God prepared an amazing person here they are but like usually it’s not a grand big thing with trumpets and bells and sirens being like this is the one usually hit something subtle and it’s just like a friend of a friend or someone you meet at a conference their leg at church or something you need to go in and meet people and yet was advice like this it’s almost like we’re discouraged from that like I’m sorry no I’m not going to spend my entire life in my room reading my Bible and waiting for God to drop a guy on my front doorstep like yeah that would help my spiritual walk maybe but like I need to feel get out and do stuff so if you just tell me that if I do nothing don’t you bring them to me because education that’s not true oh and another thing it’s almost like as soon as you say that you’re sad being single like oh I wish I was in a relationship everyone’s like oh look at what if you’re called to singleness don’t you know you need to be happy being called to singleness you need to be content be content being singles it’s like okay I get it like I’m supposed to be happy with my life and it’s all to the Lord I mean and that’s fine for the time that I was single and I was lonely I never would say that I was unhappy with life it was just there was a part in my life where I just had about it but like I love life I did lots of fun things I didn’t let it hold me back I kept going the thing is as soon as everybody got mad at me because I wasn’t content being single it was like I felt shamed the desire to get married and to have a relationship is not a bad thing proverbs Corinthians the entire Bible basically tells us that marriage is a wonderful thing and yet as a single person if I was it say that they automatically would be like no you’re your own woman you need some man to complete you I remember saying that in the first place I was just saying that I was fat but you say well if you have a friend that’s also sprinkle under prising and they’re loving it in the water relationship right now but that’s not how you feel and you are set aside and you do desire that that’s not a bad thing it’s not like one of you is right and one of you is wrong also though can everybody stop trying to pretend that they know what we’re going through like okay if you got married at like 20 and you pop those free kids by the time you’re like 28 and you’re talking to someone who’s single and like 25 and they’re like oh I’m just a sad being single don’t start the conversation with oh I totally understand any know how you’re feeling like no you don’t you don’t know how I’m feeling I’m sorry it’s not a bad thing to not understand but probably the best advice you could get would start with a little on the line is a day that one set I have no clue what that feels like but yours what I do much better than like for 10 means no because it totally diminishes what the other person is experiencing and guess overall what I want to say is that if you know someone and they tell you that they’re sad that they’re single you don’t need to call them or make them feel better fix everything or at the same time it doesn’t mean that they have no joy or peace in their life like you no need to pray for peace over them like no they’re probably very happy person they’re just sad about this one thing and that’s ok it’s ok to want to be in your relationship there’s no shame in wanting something that God has so clearly made to be a wonderful thing but the same time it’s totally private in your singleness enjoy it as well it’s like there’s one answer for everybody and that’s why I don’t like all this blanket statement as if we all are the same boat together it’s like yeah we’re all doing similar things but our walks are all different and God does have a different plan for everybody okay I really need to stop because I could go on this message for hours and just keep going so I’m just going to end it there thank you guys so much for watching and I’m sure that you a sauce in this topic as well so leave your thoughts in the comments below because I’d love to read them and as well come hang out with me on my social media because I love talking to you guys over here so until the next time I see you have a great life don’t be stupid or make bad decisions bye