today as we start in this series we have decided to limp in this series two more weeks because as I started outlining the rest of the six weeks I said I almost better say and I really think that God really has some more stuff to say about things and relationships that we don’t really talk about that really are assumed that really we pray that our relationships work but we do more maintenance and healing than we do preparation in relationships and so I really want to help people win in relationships because that’s what God wanted to do that’s why he left us the Bible that’s why she gave us the institution of church to help us win in relationship everybody say win in relationship and so this week in relationship goals we’re going to talk about something that has gotten a really bad rap like it’s something that when you think about it it doesn’t even seem appealing or good at all in most circles but as I studied the Word of God it really revolutionized my mind about how important that this topic we’re about to talk about is in every single person’s life and the topic we’re going to talk about today is singleness you see no rules on that like Oh singleness mmm that’s the mind now you said this was a series on dating and marriage I’m struggling in my marriage right now may I suggest to you that it’s a singleness problem what comes to mind I’ve got my boyfriend here looking on even kind of charge and you’re gonna talk about singleness I’m not even single anymore but your singleness may be the issue in your relationship so so today’s message title is single but not alone okay so so I want you to just sit with that for a second single but not alone and as I begin to look at what the Word of God is about relationship it started to literally stunned me how much God talks about the individuals and not the relationship when you come into church you hear stuff like this marriage is the cornerstone of the relationship that God created for the human family remember that all my life something like that but when I go back to the beginning the first thing that God created was not marriage so when I look at the landscape everybody’s go or I’ll say most people’s go is marriage in relationship that is the ultimate goal that we come out there when you see little kids and they’re playing with Ken and Barbie there what are they saying oh they’re going to get married and we learn this society-wide we learned this from church culture you woke up into a church and be 25 30 35 and ain’t you ain’t got nobody and they look at you what’s wrong with you everything okay now I’ve been seeing you spend a lot of time with your friend your own what kind of relationship do you and your own have mothers say to their sons come on and get married I need grandkids before I die we say stuff we say stuff that allows people to feel that somehow in my single state I may not be enough like if I’m not married I’m not enough and and God knows the desires of your heart so I’m not trying to get anybody to think um that that God doesn’t want them to be married and that that you can’t have a loving relationship and that which you dream about and see but I just want I want to be real with you this this morning and I want to let you know that singleness may be the most important time of your life the space where you are not responsible for anybody else except yourself the problem is most of us negate that season trying to get to a preferred future that we don’t know about you see the look of marriage you see the appeal of marriage you see the pictures of marriage you see the pic but you don’t know what it takes to do that you assume you know what it takes and I begin to do some research off 50% of marriages in America end in divorce I didn’t say 15% 50 percent ending divorce what does that mean pastor might that would be the same thing as your flight attendant telling you that this plane has a 1 out of 2 chance of getting to our next destination how often would you fly do you understand what I’m saying this there’s a 50% chance this thing is gonna crash and burn and you go die but so many people go into marriage so haphazardly Hasina a fine and look like damp haze live just what I trained but you looked on the outer you didn’t know what was on the inside and see this is the thing about marriage is it such a strong covenant that God tries to convince us not to do it unless you know that’s what you’re supposed to do and most of us are so sick of singleness that we think that marriage will solve our loneliness problem oh I’m coming to somebody’s house today see you sick of you so you think you and somebody else is gonna make you better but they figure themselves too so both y’all about to just be sick didn’t say what I’m saying because you think or you thought and if married people were honest in this room you see how quiet everybody is that like nobody does everybody’s home a spouse just type live but we’re coming to give truth so it will set you free okay what ends up happening is that most people get into marriage and they try to figure out their singleness because they never took the time to be single so they’re trying to figure out how to be married and be single and it never will work see because when you when you get into marriage then there’s conditions that you have to do as the husband that you have to do as the wife and but you do your own thing you got your own car you I in de Indy okay you’re independent I understand okay I understand that you you got all that but you were supposed to be all that before you became one oh so you’re mad now because you just can’t spend your money anyway you want to but that’s not your money anymore it’s y’all’s money for this reason should a man leave his wife and the two become you mad because you didn’t take time and figure out you single and when you don’t know you you won’t pick right because you’ll pick what you think you won’t and you have no basis on it because you have not had the time to figure you out now some people are in this room like present like it’s too late for me here she is I get it now I understand I’ve been made for do you thank me let me help you you’re stuck I’m not about to give you no type of remedy to that you’re stuck unless adultery is committed now this is the one reason God gives for divorce not we’ve grown apart this is going to be tight in here I’m gonna need police escort as we leave y’all help me not we don’t relate anymore not even he hit me I don’t condone that the Bible says leave the house Oh y’all about to be real mad if y’all don’t resolve ival but that’s not the reason to leave the marriage see what happens is is that because people go into marriage so haphazardly they think they can get out of it so haphazardly but when you get into marriage that’s why divorce is so detrimental because it’s the ripping away of souls it’s not just when I connected body it literally my mind will and emotion was connected with that person now to get a divorce we are ripping that apart that’s why divorce is the worst death to ever have it’s worse than actual death Oh Pastor Mike I promise you it is why it’s because when somebody actually dies there’s closure you can bury him you can cry you can grieve and it’s over with divorce it is a perpetual death cuz every time you see them it’s a resurrection of your emotions I can’t I can’t believe I wasted all that time on him I can he gonna be sitting over there where you are having a good day until this you have to talk about finances and alimony and kids and all these different things see some of you are so ready to get married before you do you need to talk to somebody who’s been divorced cuz they will tell you don’t do this if you don’t know that this is what you’re supposed to do and even see some of y’all looking at me like that’s not scriptural what are you talking about Paul told us go to first Corinthians for all the haters in the building go to first this okay I’m a backup and do something first because I need you to see it and I want to give it to you lovingly first see this this series is to help you it’s not to leave you in the dark and the enemy has been tricking so many of you because you don’t have knowledge you don’t understand you don’t know the Word of God so you’re getting things asking God to bless it and he said that’s against my formula like I can’t bless what I gave less that you missed it so I’m trying to show you the keys in the Word of God that will give you the formula that God can bless so go to Matthew 22 because when I started thinking about singleness and all this other stuff I said okay god you’re going to have to give me a formula to explain this to people he said I got you he said they were asking him teacher which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses jesus replied you must love the Lord your God with all your heart all your soul and all your mind that was the expected one that was doing when they were like yeah I got that I love you Jesus there’s no one else like you they didn’t they didn’t see this next part coming and second as equally important so it could have said one and one a not really second because he put it on the side he said of the Lord your God with all your heart your mind your soul but as equally important that that’s really not debatable it’s as equally important I want you to see this he says love your home neighbor but there’s a prerequisite to loving your neighbor you miss it we focus so much on loving our neighbor but you can only love your neighbor at the level that you love so you can’t figure out how to love somebody else in a relationship if you have not figured out how to love yourself in singleness and how many of us have skipped that process and tried to learn how to love somebody else it’s the wrong formula God has priority to what he does so what’s the priority love God love yourself then love others let’s do it again love God love yourself then love others the reason you don’t know how to give a compliment to her because you’ve always felt low self-esteem and insecurity about you my head look at these feet so I was 13 I can’t run those skinny jeans I’m sure I’m fat I’m tall I’m skinny you have never been alone long enough to love you so the first thing you do when you get in relationship is you pick out everything wrong with them cuz you’ve never heard learned how to love you you’ve never been isolated enough to get okay with who God created you to be and so when you don’t understand your singleness you take it into the marriage trying to make them your make up for what’s the fishing in you so you put an unrealistic expectation on another jacked up human being and you’re mad all the time because I don’t feel good enough I’m not enough and you were supposed to make me good enough and your hair ain’t Q to nothing and you put on some weight it doesn’t matter they’ll never be able to feel the emptiness that you never became okay with and let God feel when it was supposed to be you in him and I know this is over some of y’all’s hear y’all was like I just was trying to come here and see if I could find me one I was trying to see what she in here she is but she can’t see you how you are you don’t you don’t look like what you will look like once you get the revelation and so she got blinders on to how you are now but if you would allow God to have you in a place of singleness to creating you the character the work ethic the intelligence the emotional health that it takes to be in real relationship I promise you God will allow the right person to come around passing like why you say persons because God doesn’t choose your wife for you and God doesn’t choose your husband for you all pals are like the devil is alive no no no no no I got a prophetic word March 26 2014 God said he was gonna be tall like God said he was gonna be paid laughs God say okay I hear these words all the time but this is the thing that you have to understand the greatest thing that’s more important than marriage that’s more important that is your salvation and if God would not make you be saved he set it all up and he said whosoever will you still have to even win Adam he made Adam he said that he presented Eve the Greek word there means he paraded her by life you like this you’re like this you’re like this that’s what it actually means because he still had choice and so what many of us are doing is thinking that God is going to assign this person to overlook all your dumb myth all your not preparing all of your everything and and their mind God assigned them to me they will be like I don’t choose you and I’m trying to help people no that’s why your state of singleness is so important not just to you but to God because he wants to give you vision in that time he wants to give you purpose in that time he wants you to know who you are without a person because if you don’t know that it will put you on a spin to always be needing someone else to validate who God’s created you to be can I can I bust your bubble you can reach purpose without being married Jesus did it I’m all up in your religion right now like there’s people in here that are like oh my god Paul did it why are you saying this person like because I don’t want you my big goal on all of this I’m going to talk about marriage and dating and all that in the next couple weeks I think I’m gonna get pass to Natalie to preach with me on marriage I think we’re gonna go in there again okay open your glass oh I’m going to talk about all this but what I want you to realize more than anything if you’re in this room and you’re not married so you’re still single if you’re engaged are all still single if you’re still single if you’re dating you’re still single if you’re courting you’re still single if you think we do you understand what I’m saying you’re still single but I’m trying to encourage you there’s nothing wrong with the season that God has you now hear me this goes against everything you’ve been told up into this point you 34 you should be married what a house in a collar an adult I mean isn’t this the narrative that keeps playing but Jesus did equal to loving me as you need to learn how to love yourself and then you can take from the extension of loving leader and loving yourself then you can pour out oil and love somebody else may I submit to you that the problem in our society is not a relationship problem it’s a singleness problem and until people get ok being single to love God and to love themselves their relationships will always be the place where they try to get fulfillment that can never come from that relationship and I want you to understand my first point is it’s more important to be single than it is to be married ok write it down it’s more important to be single than it is to be married in the beginning God did not create marriage first he created a single human being if we look at this building what’s the first thing they did to create this building they laid a foundation you don’t see the foundation you don’t even hear the foundation no nothing but if the foundation was not there this entire building would collapse I want to tell you about what I call the prerequisite for divorce that’s my why you talk about divorce so much right now imagine I want you to know that your singleness is so important that you want to avoid getting into relationships that will not succeed because divorce is the worst thing that can happen to anybody relationally will pass Michael in their life after divorce yes there is and we’re going to talk about that and we’re going to help you walk through that but I promise you if you can avoid this pits all you want to do you know how many people we counsel who are broken children of people who got divorced and they parents on the christmas card look at my family they’re so awesome i do want to send in text that a kids balled up crying on the floor be of your decisions and you not making the proper effort that you needed to do to make sure you were in your right place before you invited him into this relationship and because you were lonely then you have sex if you had kids because you wanted to feel wanted because he stopped blowing you because he told you in the dating relationship that he didn’t really want you but you were so eager to get in a relationship so you got in a relationship and then you didn’t feel enough so you had a baby so your whole attention became about the baby and because your whole attention is about the baby he doesn’t feel wanted so he steps out of the relationship and goes and bees with her and then is broken and that’s one scenario of a million because we think singleness is not necessary we think marriage is the ultimate goal now and it could be your ultimate goal and God wants that for you if you want it for yourself but don’t go into this haphazardly don’t look for a boyfriend so you can say that your Facebook official don’t don’t don’t do that I had a girl come up to me one time and just saying it just feels like it’s not for me to be in a relationship I mean she did just like that just like it just feels like it it’s time for me to be in a relationship I said why I’ve been single two years I mean that’s a long time Pastor Mike this time and I told her I said don’t do that I said I really feel like God’s trying to supply you with some stuff right now it’s trying to create you mold you all that other stuff I want you to be man I know that it’s going to happen for you you’re beautiful you’re talented you’re gifted God’s going to do that but just don’t don’t just don’t just just because if you go into it like that you’ll treat it like that you end up in a marriage like that and then you’ll think divorce is like that it see it’s all easy this y’all going to be walking around it but here here what I’m saying to you hear what I’m saying to you is that there’s a prerequisite for divorce can I explain it to you okay you can’t get divorced if you don’t get married do we agree okay you can’t get married cannot get married unless you’re individuals agreed okay so the prerequisite for divorce is marriage and the prerequisite for marriage is singleness what are you saying faster my point number two marriage is only as good as your singleness like like if your singleness is not a good foundation your marriage ain’t gonna be the thing that builds the house see you by yourself how you feel by yourself how you look at the world by yourself what you do by yourself it’s the foundation and whoever you are that’s who you’re bringing to the marriage you don’t get change because you got finer than you ever did for one day in a white dress and Mac makeup your makeup was beat and you got all your subs your eyebrows on fleek and you got your suit Ian you finally fit in that don’t change your inside so for that day it’s great it’s a fairy tale it’s awesome it’s momentous it’s dreamy it’s magical but then next week when you move to my toothbrush what I’m sorry sweetie why did you move my toothbrush did you use mushrooms Broadstreet no no your didn’t you hear what I’m talking about why people get divorced when the seeds of these things start is because they never really knew what they were getting into okay so I’m trying to help you right here marriage is only as good as your singleness let me ask you a question if they knew whoever you’re trying to get in relationship with if they knew you how you know you would they want to be married to you no no no I’m talking about you I’m talking about how you you notice stuff do you do that don’t nobody else know you do you know how messy you are you know how anal you are about some stuff you know that some people got a five-second rule you got a five-minute rule we all have things that people don’t know but if they knew you like you know you would they still marry you because that’s what the process is supposed to look like when you come into marriage can I give you something that changed my whole life marriage doesn’t improve your singleness it exposes it i’ma say it again cuz y’all missed it marriage doesn’t improve your singleness people think that marriage is the upgrade for them to become something better all that thing is gonna do is pull back the sheet on who you really are so you have to make sure that your preparation in the time of being single is one that is intentional where we do what spend time with God spend time with yourself and then you can be focused on loving them when the last time you went to the movie by yourself when the last time you took yourself on a date [Music] some of y’all like that didn’t even make sense does it say myself on a date just go somewhere you ain’t never been before and eat and think about your life and ask yourself questions why did I respond like that find out about you can I give you two of the most amazing words that you can ever have whether you’re single to married but will real help you in your singleness self-aware self-awareness is one of the biggest epidemics in the world like you don’t know how you make everybody else feel you don’t know that you think like we all smelled it you like you like it’s like like like you ain’t even there like he was here with me like we can smell with you you live with that the same way we can smell you in the natural that’s what gossip smells like in the spirit we can smell your bad character we we get to see your fruit drop and it’s bitter like you’ve gotta become self-aware in your singleness so that you know what you’re bringing to the marriage most people they don’t realize that nothing happens in marriage except exposure just please write that down I can’t hide nothing from my life like even when I remember this certain time I’m just going to go we’re a hot church humble open and transparent I’m gonna just go ahead and Kelly I’ll remember this one time you know I’m a boy and I don’t know if it’s just me but as a young man there were times where you know I went to in three days without taking a shower you can say – but your man did it – not so quick I just plan he did but so I got married when I was 23 okay now I’ve lived with people but I didn’t never live with nobody that saw me getting out the shower do you understand what I’m saying and I didn’t know that people calculate it how many times that you get in and you get out of this I just didn’t know like I was never there is this like yeah okay yeah and how do you know if I get in and out of charm maybe I did a washer some of y’all know about washer sorry I’ll be a fake but some of y’all really know what I’m talking about my wife came to me one day and you know you’re newly married everything is the right time and I came up top I got give me kids and she’s like oh I mean Hollis was so excite I remembered to sing along and I’ll say hey girl what you trying to do she said nothing until you take a shower and didn’t begin to tell me it’s been four days since you I how did you know how did you know she could smell me but more than that she was there I was exposed and where I could usually lie or slither my way out of it if I was not in covenant with somebody the Covenant makes you have to be x4 how was Adam and Eve found in the garden make it they were single people who were exposed they had nothing to hide so their singleness how they really were could not be hidden my question to you is what are you hiding from everybody else that your mate will find well we’ve been married 10 years you don’t know keep being married she’ll find it my wife has been able to point out insecurities in my life that I didn’t even know was there oh you’re comparing yourself with them why talk about they doing a thing I’m doing my thing okay and it’ll be like the most random moment where I’m things you say right there Leigh is like she picked up from a six weeks ago and she’s like that bit you’re comparing us on like that I will why because God gives the anointing to your spouse to expose and uncover anything that’s not like him so if you don’t work on the in your singleness you will be frustrated in your marriage which will lead you to divorce that will be the death that never in that’s why I Malachi the Bible says I am the Lord your God and I hate divorce hear what I’m saying to you Church marriage does not improve your singleness it exposes it go to Ecclesiastes 3 and I want to read a couple of verses because this is my encouragement today I just came to encourage every single person don’t jump into marriage because the married people we don’t have to have two weeks for them for all the craziness that they going through and won’t even say a man to because it’s that real you have people that are in marriages because they’re better business arrangements it’s more convenient financially than to get a divorce and that’s not what God wanted for every person and he can turn it around hear me when I say that if there’s only one person that can turn marriages and relationships around it’s not our government it’s not just counseling it’s going to be Jesus intervening in those situations and getting the heart of an individual see some of y’all are mad because God ain’t spoke to him he won’t even come to church with me he won’t even do that and God says that the the stance of one woman in a saved household can turn the entire household if the stance of one minute why because in the beginning he did not make Adam and Eve’s marriage he made male and he made singles and when he made singles that’s how you want to do to develop so that they could really be run so I want to let you know that there’s a time in a season for everything you’ve heard this but I want you to know there’s a time and a season for your singleness for everything there is a season a time for every activity Under the Sun a time to be born a time to die a time to plant and a time to harvest a time to kill and a time to heal a time to tear down and a time to build up a time to cry in a time to laugh a time to grieve in a time to dance a time to scatter stones in a time to gather stones a time to embrace and a time to turn away a time to search and a time to quit searching I said a time to search in a time to quit searching I said a time to search and I said a time to quit sir some of you are so occupied with finding him yo Boaz some of y’all looking for your proverbs 31 warming and literally you can walk into any room with girls and they were on my proverbs 31 said and they like but y’all haven’t studied a that woman was a boss like the proverbs 31 woman was so focused on purpose and doing think she even need no man assuming all around her so thirsty I don’t see you make it with your clothes on oh I know every crease and dimple every I’ve seen it only you showed it to me on Instagram hear what I’m saying to you you only get preoccupied of showing off what you have when you’re not working on what you have on the inside of you and if you’re cultivating and moving what God has placed on the inside of you I ain’t got time to be taking selfies the wet I got work in my field I’m doing what God has called me to do and I’m running that race so hard and then God will speak to me say look over and you’ll find a man that’s running as hard as you oh yeah you start don’t stop running for him you gotta keep running and we God says look there he is but what we see the women of God slowing down to take care of a grown child oh Jesus held me but he got potential but he hasn’t cultivated it and what was God’s instructions in the garden for main cultivate in this work this dominate this can I give you taping we and even talking about dating yet but if he ain’t working nothing you got to stay away can I help you because let me say it like this because if you take two eggs and one of them is rotten and you cook them together the omelets still bad what we try to do is take a good egg pure intentions right your mind said Jesus on the mainline tell them what you want and then we bring a bad egg when he just got potential he just had a rough pass and I can fix him and I can I can do all of this and he’s supposed to teach you to work he’s supposed to lead you how can you have somebody leading you and fellas the time for passive relationship and passive leadership is over you own two K all day you plant video games [Applause] you with your boys all day pro you need to be working something tending to something getting your education standard let’s start the business fail at a business start another one why because I’m tending to but to looking for him cuz he fine and he got light see this is the trick of the enemy though because you buy something that looks good in the store but it has no functionality in real life but it was a final sale so you commit to something you can’t take back and now you’re mad cuz you gotta stay with it just come on let’s be honest but it’s because people did not value their season of singleness there’s so many other things but I just want you to tell you there’s a time and a season skip down in ecclesiastics 3 and go down to verse 9 just go to verse 11 let’s don’t got time said yet God has made everything beautiful everything beautiful for its own time he’s planted eternity in the human heart but even so people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from the beginning to the end so I’m concluding there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can and people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor these are gifts from God like this point down it’s okay to be single but not good to be alone it’s okay to be single but it’s not good to be alone well Pastor Mike I feel like you’re you’re hitting us on a technicality right now because last week you said that in Genesis chapter 2 verse 18 you said it’s not good for man to be alone that’s very true you need to know what that word means because we think it means lonely we think it means it’s not good for a man to be lonely can I give you the definition of lonely because this is what we think when somebody says all they’re all alone they really have in their mind a definition of lonely which means lonely is the state hold on well man help me Jesus give me one second my computer just glitched out on me alright I’m not supposed to say that man there it is okay lonely if sad because one has no friends or company without companions of solidarity so this is what we think it’s not good for a man to be alone oh he’s alone the Hebrew word for alone means all in one it’s not good when he looked that man he said it’s not good for a man to be all in one so what did he do he took the man and he took out of the man a woman a man with a womb okay I want you to see what happens here so he made man not all in one okay I want you to see this so it’s not good for man to be all in one so we’re not why we need accountability we need somebody to help us we need we need to be surrounded in relationship great but this is the thing that I want everybody to see alone is not the same thing to single single look at the definition because this was God’s idea he made male and female single means separate apart and detached different it means unique original and distinct special it means whole everybody shot at me whole God wants us to enjoy a season in our life without anybody else where we are Oh complete unified one with ourselves to be one what I came to tell you is that the more single you become the better your marriage will be the more unique the more whole the more different separate than everybody that’s what God wants for you he’s put in you a specific DNA that you have not given him the time to reveal to you please let God reveal to you who he’s created you to be I know you want to be married I know you want to be Buddha I know you don’t want to spend Valentine’s alone in this February for what is the time and season that God has you in is developing your singleness so that you can be everything he’s created you to be and reach purpose hear me people dating listen to me you need to ask God is this even worth my time right now hear me because many of the things that we do and we long for are a waste of time what the enemy cannot destroy he distracts hear me what the enemy cannot destroy he distracts and many of us have been distracted in wrong relationships and that don’t even have to be a sexual relationship or that can be friends what he cannot destroy he will distract you with people and things and situations around you know that God wants to use this season last point this is for everybody in this room maximize your singleness this I was telling some guys the other day when you don’t have nobody you’re responsible for it this is time you can do stuff that will set you up for your future like you don’t have nobody telling you that you have to be somewhere to change somebody’s diaper you can perfect what God has placed in your hands and we squander it on trying to fit in with people we won’t even know ten years from now I will give you a prime example in my life I stopped playing basketball when I was in the ninth grade not because I couldn’t play it was because I had found a piece of my purpose and music I quit everything you can ask my parents I stopped playing basketball the coaches would come in ask me man come play basketball we – did items like nope I’m really going to focus on music for the next four and a half years okay I was in a relationship but I was still single let me help you you can you can talk to people and be around people and hang out with people but guess what you’re still single and we don’t get that in today’s culture if I’m dating you I’m married to you oh this is what we think and even if we don’t think it this is this is how we act if we recording we are men oh I I have not committed to shut everything down that I’m doing to become one with you because that’s what happens when you get married and the marriage has to become one so my purpose has to align with their purpose and their dreams and goals have to line my with their why are you asking them that after y’all married hear what I’m saying maximize your singleness I don’t care if you’re 48 in girl going on vacation by yo so get the big floppy hat the big one walk out there do do your thing why because you’ll never get this time back again customize this just not deep enough for me you want me to come out to service and do this hear me when you get into a relationship and you’re in counseling the first thing I’m gonna ask you is what you’re doing your single life what was your devotion life like in your single life how much did you pray when you were single because you got all the time in the world why I feel like I don’t know what to do tonight I’m gonna go to the movies I’m going to go to this it spend time with God get to know yourself and then you will have the capacity to love others what do you saying as my dad’s not everybody’s story does not everybody’s testimony I know but the results of not spending proper time single always ends up the same and hurt people hurting people I’m like how do you know I counsel them all the time I’m up here praying which all all the time we’re getting called last night I’m thinking about committing suicide why pastor might because we’ve let other people define who we’re supposed to be when it was supposed to be just us and God and if you could just get into place where it’s just you and God and you learn how to love you flaws and all and you start running after purpose and you become who God’s created you to be you won’t marry a counterfeit because you’ve worked too hard on you you’re worth more now see when you think somebody’s going to complete you you hurry to get with them but when you’re complete by yourself you can be choosy ah nah baby i love you you find but you can’t leave me you know what you have everything that i really would like except you haven’t let god do with those insecurities and when we come together and consummate our marriage what’s in you automatically spiritually transfers to me Oh y’all don’t think so oh there’s such thing called a soul tie that’s why you can’t just go around having sex with everybody that’s a protection mechanism not so that all gods don’t want us enjoy if he will whiny just give us our parts on our marriage day I had somebody to ask me that one tufflips why wouldn’t he just give us our private areas when we got married like they just boom just appeared I said because he’s trying to teach you one of the fruits of the spirit self-control and he knew he was gonna mess up and you was gone saying that’s why sin his son that’s why I his grace poured out over you but do we use his grace as if it’s worth nothing know that’s what Galatians tells us we have to learn and progress and go and it’s just because many of us didn’t stop and recognize the time in the season God has a sin next week we’re gonna talk about dating and courting and all that other stuff but I came to encourage somebody this might not have been for everybody but I promise you God spoke to you something but there’s some people in this room who have been discontent with the season of singleness that they’re in and I came to encourage you that there is nothing more precious than this time where you get to be with just you and God and you learn how to love yourself maximize your singleness every young lady hear me every young man hear me maximize your singleness when I was in that season of just perfecting myself I worked on my gift so much but I was able to at a time where most people had to go work for people I was able to start my own company and I’ve never had a real job until I came to work for transformation church and miss Tammy will tell you how hard of a transition that’s been for me what are you saying Pastor Mike I maximized my singleness and I found some a part of my purpose a lot of us are looking for something that will never come until we take the time to enjoy the season that we’re in I want to pray for you I want to pray for every person no matter what season of life you’re in some of you who are married or hearing this marriage and say okay I need to I’m in this thing I can’t go nowhere I’m stuck in this but we’ve been struggling in this God maybe there’s some things in me not them because the thing in marriage is you tend to blame the other person when you’re in in a place but really that person is a reflection of you if you’re married to him so they’re trying to show you something about you so every time I’m tripping at nalli why can’t you just be on this and why can’t you dot out about God’s plan I’m trying to show you you maybe there’s some areas in your singleness that God needs to work on father I’ll pray for every person under the sound of my voice that God you’re about to allow us to appreciate the season that we got I pray for for every person who is single in this place that is not married god I thank you that they’re single but they’re not alone they’re not all in one you you have you have created community for them you’ve created a place a church where they can be around people God you’ll send people around them to encourage them father but they they’re learning to be content with you and who you’ve created them to be father let us not skip the step that will save us from divorce let us not skip the step that will save us from heartache God I’m praying that our relationship goals would be based off of your word that they wouldn’t be based off of emotions or feeling because they can lie to us but they will be based off the truth of what your word says father you told us that we’re supposed to love you as the number one commandment and just as equally we’re supposed to love ourselves so that we can love others teach us how to do that in priority let us build a solid foundation so that our relationships will succeed I speak over this group of people watching and listening that their relationships will succeed God that you are supernaturally giving them instructions of what to do to turn it around in the name of Jesus every broken relationship every person that’s in I’m walking through a strained relationship every person father God that’s in the season of divorce god I’m just thinking that you can turn it around but you’re not going to start with us you’re going to start with one and I thank you that you change us as individuals and may we always be perfecting our relationship with you so that you can make us who were supposed to be in Jesus name we agree amen give God some praise in this place amen

https://www.Christiandatingmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/hqdefault-1.jpghttps://www.Christiandatingmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/hqdefault-1-150x150.jpgcdmadminOnline DatingRelationshipVideoalone,christ,dating,goals,god,jesus,lonely,married,relationship,relationship goals,relationship status,represent,sermon,single,transformation church,tulsatoday as we start in this series we have decided to limp in this series two more weeks because as I started outlining the rest of the six weeks I said I almost better say and I really think that God really has some more stuff to say about...